Thursday, January 31, 2008


The past 18 hours have been less than stellar.

To start the strange cluster of events, I found a handwritten note on my driver's side door as I walked to my car to leave work. The author very rudely noted that he/she "saw" me back into his/her car. Apparently, he/she knows my name, too. It is Asshole.

Grrr. Not only have I never in my life backed into a parked or moving car, I never moved my car once I arrived at work yesterday. There was no name or phone number left on the note, just an ominous warning that I'd be hearing from them.


So, I called the campus police in an effort to file a non-complaint or something. Dark, dark memories of fighting for years with insurance companies (EVIL BASTARDS) when I got run over by a drunk driver who plead guilty washed over me and I was not about to let someone's insurance company get any ideas. Goddamn it. Over-reactionary? Sure. Do I care? No. I just wanted to be on record as not being an this so called asshole, damn it.

The officer looked at my car and noted in my case file (no, really) that indeed, the copious amounts of dust on my car had not been disturbed in any way and therefore it is extraordinarily unlikely that I would have backed up into someone's car. Cheers for a filthy car!

Later in the evening A. and I went to the Cowgirls basketball game where they just never came out of the shoot, you know? The fought like hell in the second half, but lost to a lucky three-point shot by Utah in the last five seconds of the game. My heart was broken. BROKEN.

Returning home, Buster and Belle greeted us at the front door. They were supposed to be in the back room, secure and warm and inside because it was too cold to leave them outside. Hmm? How had they gotten out? By chewing and scratching and generally ruining things.

Where were the four dozen chocolate chip cookies I'd baked the night before?

In the content bellies of Buster and Belle. Chocolate. Dogs. JESUS. I made a frantic call to the vet's emergency line and kept an eagle eye on the two little shits to see if they were acting funny. The vet called back and said because it was milk chocolate they were fine, it wasn't enough to hurt them. She said I might have a night of cleaning up diarrhea and barfing ahead of me, though.

Thankfully there were no messes to clean up, but Buster did keep me up all night whining with a belly ache.

I am whipped.


  1. People are strange. Someone "saw" you back into their car? Ugh.

    At least you didn't have any doggy digestive issues to clean up! My mom's dog once snagged AN ENTIRE CHEESE PIZZA off the counter and ate the entire thing, all 10 slices of it. He had digestive issues for DAYS.

    Also, I want a dog.

  2. What? They saw you back into their car? What the hell? I can't wait to hear what happens if you ever do hear from them.

    Stuff like that will make me sick to my stomach, literally. I feel for you and hope that the actual asshole (the accuser) gets in trouble for making false accusations against a nice person. Sheesh.

    My dogs like to eat contraband. They are quite familiar with the teaspoon of hydrogen peroxide. Works like a charm, but a nasty clean up.

    I hope today is better!!!

  3. Take a picture of the back end of your car with all the undisturbed dust. You know... just in case. To go with the police report.

    Fresh baked chocolate chip cookies? And the dogs ate them? Oh, you have such self-control. Had it been me, ingesting chocolate would have been the least of the dogs' worries. ;)

  4. what a day... i'd be freaked out about the car thing, too, but would not have had the smartypants idea to call the campus police. BRILLIANT move there.

  5. keep that note... just in case they have to do a hand writing analysis (you know, if your car gets keyed). Also, park in a different lot for awhile - that guy sounds whacked!

  6. I'm so very sorry about your bad day. I hope the dogs are okay.

    On the plus side - WE HAVE NOW FOUND A BONAFIDE REASON TO KEEP OUR CARS DIRTY AND DUSTY. I'll be noting this to my husband on Saturday, when he suggests to me that I might wash my car. "Heck no" I'll say, "I'm keeping us safe from jerks who claim that I backed into them in the parking lot." GENIUS.

  7. Scary when people leave vaguely threatening notes and have no apparent basis in reality! Yikes!

    Your dogs: just bein' dogs, right?

    hope the next day is less crazy!

  8. Ugh, what a bad day. Good for you for having the sense to get a cop to check out the scene of the alleged accident before anything actually happens. Now you have proof that the other person certainly can't have.

  9. Gosh, I can't believe I washed the car last weekend. DARN.

    I like your hair!

    This reminds me of when someone called the cops, when I was working at the school in your town, to let them know I had hit them at an intersection and driven away (um, no, unless I have the Worst Memory Ever). They "recognized" my car parked at work, called the cops, and then cops showed up to question me in my office, and then to question me on the street, by my car. After a long, confusing time, they realized another car, identical to mine, was parked in a lot across the street.

    Hope the puppies are feeling okay--I'm sure they're fine. Dogs are dumb. Let us not forget the birdseed incident.

  10. Even though dogs do stupid things, I still want one.

    The asshole who left the note will never come back. I will make a bet with real money on this.

    The hair is really great--good going!

    Is it cold yet where you live?

  11. I always KNEW there was a very good reason to keep my car filthy! Thank you!

    Hope your weekend turned out better than your Thursday. At least January is over.

  12. Wow. As someone who DID have some dog vomit issues over the weekend, let me just say, in all you got off lucky with just the whining. Our bedroom still reeks of canine stomach acid. Sexy.


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