Tuesday, April 29, 2008

She Meandered Through Her Thoughts and Her Day

A man is outside my office window (three floors down, thankfully), spraying herbicides. He is wrapped in protective gear, breathing through a respirator. It is freaking me right the hell out. So, on this beautiful spring day (FINALLY), I am closing my window and feeling twitchy.

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Buster and Belle have been kind of pissy with each other lately. Belle isn’t letting Buster eat his food, and they are getting into little tiffs at least once a day. What the hell? I am hoping more regular walks will cheer all of us up. I know they cheer me up!

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I really love going for walks; it has been one of my favorite indulgences ever since I was a little kid. I even considered writing The Thesis around the experience of pedestrians, and still wonder if I shouldn’t have moved forward with that topic instead of the topic I am messing around with now. I’ll write more on this later.

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Although, the experience of pedestrians is playing a large role in The Thesis as it is. Again, I’ll post more on that later. (You can’t wait, can you?)

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The number of households receiving food stamps in the state has increased dramatically since last month. I find myself so thankful that the rise in food prices didn’t start in earnest until after February and March when so many low-income folks are struggling to pay for heat in this part of the country. By March, monetary reserves for heat are usually depleted, and it is a difficult, lonely, and cold month for many families around here.

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The combination of A. in grad school and my small salary working for a very unglamorous (but very gratifying!) non-profit has meant that my own household has teetered on the very edge of a low-income existence. It is startling, and on many days, depressing. March was a difficult month for us, too.

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My two best friends are doing well financially, which is great. They work hard and deserve it. However, I feel like we are starting to drift and I really think it is largely because I can’t afford to fly back East. It breaks my heart. I am falling out of touch with these people that truly make up my world. I’ve been struggling mightily with that a lot lately. It would help enormously if I had the patience to talk on the phone.

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I sprouted some wheat a couple of weeks ago and added it to my homemade bread. It made the loaf so moist and yummy. A. still makes comments about it. Woo hoo!

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I get all gooey and teary-eyed thinking about The Delightful Little (Nephew) M. I wonder if he is starting to coo a little bit? Oh, cooing! I sense another road trip coming up…

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Um, Rockies bullpen? Starters? What the hell?

8 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry about your friends. I don't want to think that money makes a difference in friendships, but it DOES. Depressing.

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  2. It is hard when friends make either a ton more or a ton less. Someone's feelings always seem to get hurt when outings are suggested.

    It's got to be harder when they don't live close.

    Rockies-Twins in less than 3 weeks! The battle of the Mediocre! I'm psyched.

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  3. I'm sorry about your friends too. I think it's about time for them to come visit you.

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  4. Oh, they do visit, too! At least once or twice a year. It is just hard. Distance + disparity in incomes is taking it's toll, I think.

    We used to take trips together and they know that isn't much of an option for me right now. It still stings not to be asked to join them in trips, but I know they hate to put me in a position to have to say no. They are very thoughtful about the situation. It is just a tough situation all around.

    But! At least I have the Rockies! The Meeting of the Mediocre, indeed!

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  5. ugh, that does suck. maybe.. um.. train trips out east? or play the lottery more? :-)

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  6. I hear ya. A bunch of my friends are attorneys in private law firms, and literally make twice or three times as much as I do. I work in public service and while I have a lot of benefits they don't, I also have a lot less disposable income. Unfortunately, sometimes I feel like the difference in money makes us unable to relate in several areas. Totally depressing.

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  7. I was that way with my friends, probably about 8 or nine years ago now. As they started families, etc. I was one of the ones with more disposable income and planning trips/outings wanting to include them, but knowing they wouldn't be able to participate. Now, we're all in the same place with our lives: all done school, all have mortgages, full-time jobs and families. Even though the family incomes are different, the rest of the lifestyle has become the great equalizer. I guess what I'm saying is that, even if you drift apart now, it can come back and be just like before.

    Your wheat sprouting sounds cool. I think malt syrup (used in brewing and baking) is derived from wheat sprouts. Did it add a malty taste?

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  8. LoriD - The wheat sprouts did add a bit of malty taste. It was YUMMY.

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