Friday, August 20, 2010

Friday Five

1. I am so flippin' relieved to know I will not be making a mad dash to be on the road by 6:00 p.m. to start an epic road trip. I am full of energy just because I know I won't be trapped in the car this weekend.

2. A very good friend of mine sent me some good advice about my current stand off with The Thesis. (Thanks, MT! Have an awesome weekend with all things Disney!) I am going to tumble around in that advice over the weekend.

3. The students are all returning as university classes start on Monday. It really sucks to live in this town this time of year. SUCKS SO HARD. I am planning to do my grocery shopping at 11:00 p.m. Saturday night. So. Annoyed.

4. Buster has taken to the idea that he cannot go outside to pee in the morning until after he's had his breakfast. A. deals with this nonsense every morning. Buster does his weird staring/backing up thing in A.'s line of vision until he relents and fills his food bowl. After snarfing the food down in 15 seconds (I wish I was kidding), he then prances around nervously, because, DUDE, he has to PEE.

5. Dogs. They are ridiculous.

Happy Friday to you!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Decided. Well, One of Many Things, Anyway.

I wrote this post once today. For whatever reason, it feels positively epic to have try and put it together again. (Also. Blogger, where the fuck did my post go?)


I have decided not to go to the memorial. While it would be nice to see my family, a 24-hour road trip over the course of 60 or so hours just doesn’t feel reasonable. I think I will write a letter and ask my other uncle to read it at the ceremony.

I feel so much better, so unburdened, since making this decision. Maybe I am selfish jerk, but I just couldn’t face this long trip this weekend.

But, you know what? I think I am finally okay with making decisions now and then that take care of me.


I am still wrestling with how to proceed on The Thesis. Do I just write 500 words a day and turn it in on Halloween, no matter what? Maybe.

The thing is, The Thesis has just turned into The Fucking Miserable Thing That Needs To Get Done. It isn’t about studying a topic I am interested in, it isn’t even about getting my master’s. I am trying to remember what motivated me to pull up my roots and leave all the people I love in DC to go back to being dirt ass poor and in school. What was it I was looking for? What was my goal, my dream? I didn’t do this because I had a specific career goal necessarily. I want to work in community development in non-profits, but I honestly could have done that without this degree.  If I started an entry-level position in a community development agency I am sure I would have moved up the organization’s ladder and would be doing fulfilling work right about now. (Though, I love my current job.) School kind of got in the way of that, in a sick twist of fate.

Why did I do this?

Maybe if I can rediscover my original motivation I can use that as the reminder I need to just sit down and write every day. Then it might be less about just getting something done, which has very little payoff for me, to accomplishing a larger goal. Instead of finally losing something (the thesis would be gone, finally) I would be gaining something in the form of a larger goal/accomplishment met that means something to me.

Does that make any sense?



I have been pining over a sewing machine for quite some time, now. I think I have narrowed my choice down to this one, a Janome 8077. I think it would be good for a beginner (ME), but that it would allow for me to grow into it with more elaborate projects for many years to come. From reviews I’ve read, it is a good workhorse.

And speaking of projects, I already have a number of them lined up!
  • Winter curtains for the house
  • Summer curtains
  • Curtains for the camper thing that sits in the back of the truck that can’t go anywhere. Might as well be pretty!
  • Handmade everyday napkins
  • Handmade holiday napkins
  • Handmade special occasion napkins
  • Handmade neckerchiefs for both A. and I
  • A super cool Christmas present for A.’s mom and a couple of friends. (email if you want to know what it is, but you might be one of the recipients! If I get my ass in gear.)
  • Kitchen apron
  • artist apron (for when I paint)
  • fruit and produce cozy’s to protect them in my lunch bag or purse
  • Silverware pouch to take silverware along for homemade lunches away from home
  • New seat cushion for A.’s grandpa’s cool wooden chair in our living room
  • New seat cushions for the couch
  • New throw pillows to accompany the new seat cushions on the couch
  • New throw pillows for our bed and the guest bed
  • Hem the two shirt dresses I have hanging in my closet to accommodate my short legs
  • Hem pants to the proper length
  • Hem skirts to the proper length
  • Hem, take in, re-purpose old or thrift store clothes. (Currently, I am obsessed with this blog.)
  • Eventually start to make my own clothes

So, I think I could get some use out of the damn thing. That is, if I knew how to sew. I don’t really know how to sew. I used to sew a little bit as a young girl, and could sew a mean pillow when I was 12. But I haven’t sewn since. I think tracking down a sewing class or mentor would be pretty easy, however.

Thoughts? Do any of you sew? Do you have any machine recommendations?


Happy Thursday to you!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Make My Decisions for Me, Please. No, REALLY.

My uncle's memorial is this Saturday. I am struggling with whether or not to go. The trip is 12 hours one way and I can't really take any time off from work right now.

My plan is to drive six hours Friday night, finish the trip Saturday morning, attend the memorial and hang out with the family for a few hours, drive four to six hours toward back toward home and finish the trip on Sunday. maybe if I arrive home before 6:00 p.m. I won't feel so fucking wrecked the entire next week.

Normally, I would never drive 24 hours to spend five hours with people. But this is my uncle's memorial. It will also quite likely be the last time I see my grandmother. We are not close, but you know, it is a respect thing.

What do I do?

If I am being hones, I really want to stay home. It is out of a sense of obligation and good old fashioned guilt that I feel like I should go. True, I would like to see everyone, and I would like to be there to say goodbye to my uncle. He had a very, very lonely death. A death that will haunt me for the rest of my days, I am afraid. At least I could be there now, right?

Again, what would you do?


I am tossing around the idea of setting a Final Date for The Thesis. Either it is done or I walk away from it on Halloween.



A. and I got home from work last night at nearly 8:00 p.m. As is my custom, I darted to the bedroom to change into my jammies and shed the ornaments of work: my watch, necklace, rings, earrings, contacts.

It was only then that I noticed I had two very different earrings hanging from my ears. Both were long and beaded, but still quite different. Thankfully, I had worn my hair down so I do not think anyone noticed.

However, what the fuck? I cannot even dress, groom, or accessorize myself properly anymore! I need an honest-to-gawd vacation. NOW.


Happy Wednesday to you!

Friday, August 13, 2010

Friday Five

1. As I was walking toward my building on my way to work this morning, a friendly woman crossed my path and we chit-chatted for a while. I had never met her before, and enjoyed the happy-see-strangers-arent-bad-we-can-beat-the-suburbs-isolation moment. We both said goodbye in happy, sing-song voices.

2. As I walked to the doors of my building and caught my reflection in the glass I saw that I still had a roller in my bangs.

3. I am having some serious issue with The Thesis and whether or not it is worth my time (and my life!) to finish. More on that later, possible over at Fledgling.

4. I get to see my three nephews on my side of the family this weekend. I cannot wait. I CANNOT WAIT. I walked by a display of cotton candy and had to get some "for the boys." I damn near plopped down $35 on three teeny Wyoming Cowboy baseball hats for them.

You can bet that I will, indeed, be pinching their cheeks tomorrow.

I need to be stopped.

5. Otters. They are quite possibly the most awesome animal on Planet Earth.


Happy Friday to you!

Monday, August 9, 2010

A Little of This, A Little of That

A. and I spent the weekend in multiple festivities for our friend's Pakistani wedding. The fabrics! The cutsoms! the rituals! THE FOOD!

Also, it was so wonderful to finally see H. and B. get married. They have wanted this for a long time. Oh, it was a wonderful, wonderful weekend!

And I got dressed up for the occasion. He looked SO HOT. I will upload a picture later.


The left front tire on the truck is pointing left, and the right front tire is pointing right.


We still have to get three more cords of fire wood, and our truck isn't going anywhere for a while. Oh, 2010 can suck it.


I wore "grown up" shoes to work last week for half a day. (2" slingbacks). My right big toenail is purple as a result. So, screw grown up shoes! I am sticking to sandals and flip flops and frumpy clogs.

My heels are SO FREAKIN' NARROW that I can't wear pumps or slip ons. Even mary janes fall off. I literally just walk out of my shoes. Sometimes I can manage sling-backs, as I can tighten the back strap enough. But usually, I just smoosh my feet into the shoes, and my toes pay the price. I am a quadruple narrow (AAAA), and it is IMPOSSIBLE to find shoes in that size. It is nearly impossible just to find narrow shoes (A).

It sucks SO BAD.

I just want some pretty shoes, dammit.


The upcoming weekend A. and I are traveling to my hometown for my step-grandparent's 60th wedding anniversary. I get to see all three nephews on my side! I bought the 5-year-old a canister thing with a built-in magnifier to catch and look at bugs. I got the two-year-olds these microphones to sing into. They just have holes in the front and back and sort of amplify noise. No battieries or anything. I also got all three of these cute little squeezy fish things to squirt water in the tub.

I hope they like the gifts.

I am exhausted, but I cannot wait to see these three kids play together. Wahoo!


After hanging out with all of B. and H.'s family over the weekend, I am really looking forward to seeing all my family this weekend. I wish we all lived closer to each other.


Happy Monday to you.